If I try hard enough I can find something to change about my body. I became aware of these flaws from what I thought were the closest people to me. As a young girl I remember being told that I should consider getting a nose job. “Well, because your nose is too wide and it doesn’t fit your face.” As a teen I remember my distinct signs of womanhood being a challenge. “Your butt is too big. Your hips are too wide.” As a young adult I remember being asked if I had been overweight because my right leg is noticeably larger than my left leg and I don’t have defined ankles. “More like cankles. LOL”
I’ve been patiently listening to all of the evidence presented in this trial and now “I object.” I am an average woman. I do not have to give myself the pressure of upholding a certain image other than the image I desire for myself.
Society telling us to embrace our flaws may sound effective, but women more often than not find solace in struggling with their esteem in private instead of opening up about their true desires regarding their physical appearance. Unless you ask them in a confidential poll.
According to dosomething.org 2014 statistics show that approximately 91% of women were unhappy with their bodies. If that’s not enough to eat at your soul try swallowing the fact that 95% of women with eating disorders are between the ages of 12 and 25 and more than 40% of women agree they would consider cosmetic surgery in the future.The constant message women hear about embracing their natural beauty and flaws alone will not promote the long term body positivity we would all love to see in this world. Looking in the mirror and feeling less than beautiful is buried subconsciously because she is not supposed to feel this way. Verbally expressing the desire for a different image comes with a slap on the wrist and a label of insecurity or in need of self love. An unhealthy cycle emerges which doesn’t allow the woman or her loved ones to get down to the heart of the matter when it comes to her desires. Unconditional support or guidance to healthier alternatives to achieve said body goals is non existent because nothing was ever said. These women who cannot begin to express their desires suffer in silence.
Embracing your flaws is a great message but an incomplete one. You can embrace your flaws, love your body and desire to change it at the same time. I believe this is what inspires most of us to get up and make a change when it comes to our fitness goals. It is not shameful, insecure or negative to think this way. At the end of the day self love should not equate to a disregard for your personal desires about your physical appearance. This process of thinking gives us the freedom to escape negative body image but empowers us to create the changes we feel will allow us to live out the true desires that we want to see within ourselves which is something super special!
That right leg of mine that is bigger than the other? It has mild edema from a sport related injury. It’s obvious when I wear anything that shows off my legs. I accept its condition but I still want change. I research my options and talk with a doctor. I learn that surgery and leg training to make the size difference less noticeable are both of my options. I am down with the training at this point but will choose surgery if I still want change.
The criticism and heated debates within the fitness industry from our female athletes who get breast implants to women that wear makeup to the gym or get botox and lip fillers all stems from the notion that it’s not okay for a woman to alter her appearance. The au natural woman is the superior woman and all the others are fake and insecure. We need to respect that each woman has her own reasons for the way she wants to look and the changes she makes to her body. #effbeautystandards